TO MUSE OR NOT TO MUSE

TO MUSE OR NOT TO MUSE – I SUPPOSE IT’S ALL JUST MORE MENTAL MASTURBATION – BUT IT BEATS HANDS-DOWN BEING A DAMN VEGETABLE. I CAN’T – BY PROMULGATING THESE GENUINE THOUGHTS – BE ANY MORE OR LESS CEREBRAL OR NONPRODUCTIVE THAN THE GREAT MAJORITY OF RESIDENTS SITUATED ON THIS GREAT PLANET – WHOSE DIURNAL ACTIVITIES ARE PRIMARILY COMPRISED OF OR BY BIOLOGICAL ABSORPTION AND EXUDATION. I EAT. I DRINK. I FART – THEREFORE – I AM. THAT DOES ABOUT SUM THINGS UP FOR MOST OF US? THIS IS NOT INTENDED TO CONVEY A SENTIMENT OF DEPRECATION OR SUPERIORITY REGARDING OR TOWARDS THE VERY HARDWORKING, INDUSTRIOUS POPULACE WHO ARE SIMPLY ENGROSSED BY WORKING NINE TO FIVE, CHANGING SOILED DIAPERS, CLEANING-UP REGURGITATION, MAKING MONEY, ACQUIRING STUFF, FOCUSING ON THE PERPETUATION OF THE HUMAN SPECIES. YES, I HAVE A VERY DISTINCTIVE ADVANTAGE – I HAVE TIME – I HAVE CURIOSITY – I HAVE AN INEXPLICABLE NEXUS WITH THE UNIVERSE AND WITH NONE OTHER THAN, GOD. I AM BELEAGUERED, HAMPERED, HAMSTRUNG BY A BIOCHEMICAL BRAIN IMBALANCE, TORMENTED BY PARANOIA (EVEN AS I WRITE), OBSESSED WITH AN OPPROBRIOUS PAST AND SEQUESTERED OR CLOISTERED BY SOCIAL INJUSTICE AND OR INTOLERANCE. SO WHAT? PERHAPS IT’S ALL MERELY A SELF-IMPOSITION? LIFE IS AT TIMES TRYING FOR THE GREAT MAJORITY OF US (FOR NEARLY ALL OF US). WE ARE TO MAKE THE BEST OF OUR CIRCUMSTANCE AND TO AT LEAST MAKE A CONCERTED EFFORT TO CONTRIBUTE TO THE HUMAN CONDITION. AT LEAST WE MUST TRY.

THOUGHT AND ACTION

SO? HOW DOES THOUGHT LEAD TO MOVEMENT? WHAT IS THE LINK BETWEEN THOUGHT AND PHYSIOLOGY? AND ONCE WE UNDERSTAND THIS PHENOMENON – WILL WE BE ABLE TO ÒTHINKÓ AND TO CONTROL INANIMATE MECHANISMS – AS WELL AS AUTONOMIC BODILY FUNCTIONS – TO POSSIBLY DIRECT OUR IMMUNE SYSTEM?

POLITICIANS

DON’T THEY ALL PRESENT THEMSELVES AS POPULISTS? BECAUSE THE NATURE OF THE BEAST – MOST – IF NOT ALL POLITICIANS WILL MANIPULATE, INCITE FEAR, RANCOR, EVEN HATE TO ATTAIN POLITICAL OFFICE; DEMAGOGUERY IS A POLITICAL NARCOTIC; IT IS FAR MORE ADDICTIVE THAN CRACK COCAINE, LESS EXPENSIVE TO PRODUCE THAN ALCOHOL AND IT USES A DELIVERY SYSTEM OF RHETORIC THAT CAN AND DOES LEAD TO AN IDEOLOGICAL EUPHORIA. AS SUCH – IT’S MORE ABOUT A FACADE OF INTEGRITY OR RECTITUDE, ABOUT CHARISMA AND CONFORMITY – THAN IT IS ABOUT PROMOTING A UNIQUE, SINGULAR IDEOLOGICAL OR PHILOSOPHICAL AGENDA. JUST INQUIRE AS TO HOW MANY PROFESSED ATHEISTS OR ICONOCLASTS HOLD A POLITICAL OFFICE? ARE WE EVEN AS THEIR CONSTITUENTS WILLING TO FORGIVE ANYONE (YES, INCLUDING MYSELF) FOR A PAST THAT IS LESS THAN STELLAR OR EMULATIVE? CAN CONVICTED FELONS WHO HAVE GROWN-UP AND MATURED – EVEN PERMITTED (HAVING SERVED THEIR TIME) TO SEEK A POLITICAL OFFICE? CAN THEY MOVE ON TO A PRODUCTIVE – LABEL-FREE FUTURE? CAN “THEY” EVEN VOTE? (I DON’T BELIEVE SO.).

IT’S A SAD ASPECT OF OUR ETHOS OR MENTALITY – SUCH INTOLERANCE IN A PLURALISTIC SOCIETY IS SELF-DEBASING AND DESTRUCTIVE. WE, HERE IN AMERICA, SHUN, LABEL AND PERSECUTE THOSE WHO HAVE STUMBLED, FALTERED OR TRANSGRESSED IN LIFE. SORRY ATHEISTS AND AGNOSTICS – BUT MANY OF US HERE IN THE UNITED STATES – FOLLOW THE EDICTS REDACTED IN THE BIBLE. AS SUCH WE (THEY) STRIVE TOWARDS EMULATING CHRIST AND HIS PROPENSITY TO FORGIVE, TO LOVE, TO PRACTICE THE SOLEMONIC ATTRIBUTE OF FORBEARANCE. YET WE AS A PEOPLE STIGMATIZE, LABEL AND PERMANENTLY CRIPPLE THOSE WHO HAVE MADE MISTAKES. WE CASTIGATE, HUMILIATE AND INTERROGATE OUR POLITICAL ASPIRANTS – MAKING A BRUTAL HAZING PROCESS FAR TOO THORNY OR PROBLEMATIC TO ENDURE FOR THEMSELVES AND THEIR FAMILY MEMBERS. HOW ANYONE WEATHERÕS WHAT CAN AMOUNT TO NO LESS THAN AN INQUISITION IS A MYSTERY TO ME. WE ARE FLAWED, INQUISITIVE CREATURES; MANY OF WHOM WHO WERE INCLINED TO EXPERIMENT (EARLY-ON IN OUR LIVES) WITH DRUGS, WITH IDEOLOGICAL OR PERHAPS THEOLOGICAL , YES EVEN SEXUAL (OFTEN SELF-DEBASING) ENTICEMENTS. CONSEQUENTLY, YOU THE GENERAL PUBLIC AND COLLECTIVE NEWS MEDIA PERCEIVE ANY AND ALL INDISCRETIONS OR INFRACTIONS AS CANNON FODDER OR SUSTENANCE. MUCKRAKING HAS BECOME A NATIONAL PASTIME IN THIS COUNTRY AND THE PUBLIC REVELATION OF PRIVATE, PERSONAL SORROW, ANGUISH AND DESPAIR – HAS BECOME FOOD FOR A VORACIOUS GLUTTONOUS AUDIENCE. INSTEAD OF STONING PEOPLE TO DEATH – THOSE WHO VIOLATE CULTURAL NORMS ARE IMPEDED TO MAKE A LIVING, TO SOCIALIZE WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX, TO EVEN MAINTAIN A PLATONIC FRIENDSHIP. AND DURING THEIR PRECIPITOUS DOWNFALL – WE APATHETICALLY TAKE THEIR FAMILY ALONG FOR THE DEPRECATING DESTRUCTIVE RIDE. RELIGIOUSLY, WE PUT ON A PRETENSE OF FORBEARANCE – YET CULTURALLY – WE LAUNCH A LONG-TERM POTENTIALLY LETHAL ASSAULT THAT CAN LITERALLY DESTROY AN ENTIRE FAMILY. AND THOSE OF US WHO ARE CURIOUSLY ABLE TO MAINTAIN A SEMBLANCE OF NORMALCY (WHO ARE ONE OF “THEM” AND NOT ONE OF “US”) — WELL, THEY BECOME INSIPID, PROSAIC POLITICIANS.

JUST HOW MANY PEOPLE GO THROUGH LIFE NEVER DISCOVERING OR NURTURING HIDDEN TALENTS? HOW MANY POTENTIALLY EXTRAORDINARY PEOPLE ARE CAUGHT-UP IN THE REPETITIOUS DRUDGERY AND WASTE RESULTING FROM DRUG OR ALCOHOL ADDICTION – ADDICTION THAT RESULTS IN INTELLECTUAL AND ARTISTIC OBFUSCATION? DEPRESSION, ENNUI AND THE PERVASIVENESS AND IMPOSITION OF MIND-NUMBING ALCOHOL TRANSFORMED MY FATHER, KEN – INTO AN ICONOCLAST OR ANOMIC WHO WAS FAR MORE CONCERNED WITH SATIATING HIS PERVERSE SEXUAL NATURE – THAN WITH THAN WITH ATTEMPTING TO IMPROVE A WORLD BESET BY HATRED AND GREED. HE WANTED TO EXCEL AS A HUSBAND AND AS A FATHER – BUT HE IMMERSED HIMSELF IN PITY AND RIGHTEOUSNESS AS A COMMUNIST WHO PRAYED SOFTLY TO GOD, WHO SPOUTED HIS INDIGNATION WITH THE WORLD, WHO CONCEALED HIS ENVY FOR THE AFFLUENT. HE WANTED TO BECOME SOMEONE IN LIFE – BUT HE WAS EFFETE AND COMPLETELY LACKING IN MOTIVATION AND IMPOSITION. HE, AS WITH TEN’S OF MILLION’S OF MEMBER’S OF THE HUMAN RACE – WAS A MAN MANQUE. WHAT AN IMPONDERABLE WASTE.

WHY AREN’T SOME VERY INTELLIGENT PEOPLE CURIOUS? PERHAPS IT’S SIMPLY OVERLOAD. THERE’S JUST SO MUCH OUT THERE TO LEARN – ARCANE OR ESOTERIC – MUCH OF IT INEFFABLE (THINGS WE’LL NEVER KNOW OR UNDERSTAND). THE INFORMATION GLEANED AND OR AMASSED OVER THE PAST FIFTY YEARS WOULD CHALLENGE OR OVERWHELM EVEN THE MOST POWERFUL COMPUTER. IT WOULD CREATE A STACK OF BOOKS THAT WOULD REACH FROM HERE TO OUR DISTANT MOON AND BACK AGAIN. SOMETIMES PEOPLE – MANKIND – CAN BE BRUTAL AND HEARTLESS IN NATURE – BUT HIS DILIGENCE AND HIS GENIUS, HIS GIFT OF CREATIVITY OR AFFLATUS IS AWE-INSPIRING. IT IS MY MOOT POINT – THAT OUR NATURE TO SEEK-OUT, TO EXPLORE, TO UNDERSTAND – IS A CRITICAL PART OF GOD AND OF THE FUNDAMENTAL NATURE OF THIS AMAZING UNIVERSE. SOME GRAVITATE TOWARDS THE PURSUIT OF THINGS – STILL OTHERS ARE DISTRACTED BY SPORTS; A DEVIATION, A DETOUR, AN INTERRUPTION FROM THAT WHICH IS TRULY RELEVANT AND OR SENTENTIOUS IN LIFE. SO RATHER THAN ATTEMPTING TO FIX A WORLD THAT IS BESET BY MISERY AND TRAVAIL – RATHER THAN ATTEMPTING TO UNDERSTAND THE COMPLEXITIES OF A PARTICULAR FIELD OF STUDY – AND PERHAPS ONE DAY MAKING A CONTRIBUTION – SO MANY VIE FOR DISTRACTION OR DIVERSION. FOR MANY OF US – SATISFYING CURIOSITY MUST BE ON THE FOREFRONT OF OUR INFORMATION-ENRICHED EXISTENCE. FOR NOT ALL OF US (MYSELF INCLUDED) ARE BLESSED WITH WHAT IT TAKES TO BE A PIONEER – A RESEARCHER – CONTRIBUTOR OF MANKIND’S SEEMINGLY BOUNDLESS WEALTH OF KNOWLEDGE. IT IS TRULY SAD TO ME THAT MOST PEOPLE GO THROUGH LIFE WITH BLINDERS ON – FILTERING-OUT, YET CULLING OR WINNOWING INFORMATION (KNOWLEDGE) THAT IS SIMPLY IRRELEVANT TO THEM; UNDERSTANDING AND DISCERNMENT THAT ONLY SIMPLIFIES THE IN’S AND OUT’S OF THIS PHENOMENALLY COMPLEX WORLD. ALL OF “IT” IN IT’S SEEMINGLY BOUNDLESS SPLENDOR GRANTS IT’S HOLDER AN APERCU OF LIFE THAT WAS YET TO BE DISCOVERED MERELY A CENTURY AGO. IT GIVES THOSE IN POSSESSION OF “IT” A LOOK INTO OUR EXISTENCE – ENABLING US PHYLOGENETIC AND OR CREATION ACCOUNTS FOR WHAT AMOUNTS TO BE A PLANET WHOSE INTRICACY, GRACE AND BEAUTY – IN MY PERSONAL VIEW MUST BE THE PRODUCT OF AN INFINITE OMNISCIENT MIND. THE INEFFABLE NATURE OF IT ASIDE – IT IS FAR BETTER THAN GOING THROUGH LIFE THWARTED BY AN INTELLECTUAL VACUUM AND OR SUFFERING FROM A SEVERE SHORTSIGHTEDNESS AND THE PRESUMPTIVE PREJUDICE OR MISCONCEPTIONS WHICH COINCIDE. WE CAN AND DO SIMPLY AGREE TO DISAGREE. BUT – AS WITH POLITICS – IT IS A DISPARITY THAT IS FORMULATED AS A RESULT OF KNOWLEDGE AND NOT ECLIPSED BY BENIGHTEDNESS. ALL I’M SUGGESTING IS THAT NEARLY EVERYONE CAN BECOME – WITH A DILIGENT EFFORT – AN OVERACHIEVER. AND YES, IT APPEARS THAT THE MORE WE DISCOVER OR LEARN – THE MORE “IT” IS LAYERED, MULTI PHASIC, REDUCTIVE AND OR IRREDUCIBLE. SO ARE WE AS MEMBER’S OF THE HUMAN COGNATE OR FAMILY – BEING OVERWHELMED? AND HOW CAN WE POSSIBLY EXPOSE OUR CHILDREN TO THE EXTRAORDINARY WEALTH OF KNOWLEDGE THAT IS OUT THERE IN ORDER TO HELP THEM TO FIND THEN NURTURE INTERESTS? EVEN MOST BRILLIANT SCIENTIST’S AND INTELLECTUALS FOCUS ON OR IN PARTICULAR AREAS OF INTEREST. (IN MANY PLACES AROUND THE WORLD – AT THIS VERY MOMENT – SOME PRECOCIOUS UPSTART – HAS BECOME ENAMORED WITH A PARTICULAR FIELD (OR ORGAN) AND HAS DECIDED TO DEVOTE THE BRUNT OF HIS OR HER CEREBRAL PROWESS – THE SUM TOTAL OF HIS OR HER (MORE THAN) TWO DECADES OF EDUCATION, EXPERIENCES OF LIFE, THE CREATION OF A LEGACY FOR HIS OR HER CHILDREN – TO THE NONE OTHER THAN THE ENNOBLED FIELD OF PROCTOLOGY. YES, SOMEONE HAS TO DO. AND IT’S A PARTICULAR FIELD OF MEDICINE THAT PROVIDES A VERY VALUABLE SERVICE. IT’S JUST NOT FOR ME. AS FOR SUPERFICIAL DISTRACTION’S SUCH AS SPORTS OR VIDEO GAMES – IF IT DOESN’T PORTRAY VIOLENCE, DEMEAN WOMEN OR MINORITIES; IF IT IS ABOUT TEACHING CHILDREN SPORTSMANSHIP, FAIR PLAY AND BOLSTERING A HEALTHY COMPETITIVE SPIRIT; IF IT STIMULATES THE INTELLECT OR GETS CHILDREN MOVING – PROMOTING ATHLETICISM – OF COURSE IT’S FINE. I, PERSONALLY LOVE TO WATCH A MATCH-UP BETWEEN THE BOSTON REDS AND THE NEW YORK YANKEES – BUT THERE’S A BLARING LINE BETWEEN USING ENTERTAINMENT AS AN ESCAPE – WHILE SIMULTANEOUSLY DISREGARDING THE FUNDAMENTALS INVOLVING POLITICS OR PIVOTAL SOCIAL ISSUES SUCH AS GLOBALISM, ABJECT POVERTY, FAMINE, POLLUTION AND A VAST VARIETY OF SIGNIFICANT ISSUES THAT SEVERELY TAX OUR LIMITED RESOURCES; THERE COMPLEX CAUSES, HOW THEY EFFECT YOU, YOUR FAMILY AND COMMUNITY AND POLITICAL AND SCIENTIFIC DEBATE REGARDING POTENTIAL LONG-TERM SOLUTIONS THAT WE AS VOTER’S MUST CONSIDER. SO I SUPPOSE WHAT I’M SUGGESTING IS A BALANCE. IF I’M WRONG – PERHAPS I’M IN NEED OF ENLIGHTENMENT.

GETTING IN THE ZONE

OF COURSE IT MEANS DIFFERENT THINGS TO THOSE WITH DIFFERING BACKGROUNDS. TO ME IT’S AT LEAST IN PART – NOESIS – CONTEMPLATION THAT REVEALS GOD’S ETERNAL WORK. FOR THE BUDDHIST OR MONK – IT’S REACHING-OUT TO GOD FOR THE RARE SOUGHT-AFTER EPIPHANY. IT IS AN INSIGHT ABOUT LIFE – ABOUT PEOPLE – THAT IS USUALLY SEEN SOLELY THROUGH THE EYE’S OF GOD – THAT ON OCCASION I AM CURIOUSLY (INEXPLICABLY) GRANTED. IN ESSENCE – ONCE CONNECTED – I FEEL AS THOUGH I AM ENDOWED BY GOD WITH A SIXTH SENSE THAT EXTENDS WELL BEYOND MY PERSONAL INTUITION, INTELLECTUAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ATTRIBUTES. FOR, MICHAEL JORDAN, “GETTING IN THE ZONE” WAS THE GOD-GIVEN ABILITY TO PUT A BALL THROUGH THE HOOP FROM NEARLY ANY LOCATION ON THE FLOOR – REGARDLESS OF ANY DEFENSIVE POSTURE. TO THE NATURIST AND THE NATURALIST – IT’S I SUPPOSE IT’S GETTING IN TOUCH WITH FLORA AND FAUNA – WITH A CLEAN, PRISTINE NATURAL ENVIRON THAT WAS ONCE AS GOD AND “NATURE” HAD INTENDED IT TO BE. TO THE AGNOSTIC AND OT ATHEIST I SUPPOSE IT’S SIMPLY GETTING IN TOUCH WITH ONESELF AND IN A WORLD ENCUMBERED BY CONTRADICTORY THEOLOGICAL EDICTS THEY PERCEIVE AS UNREASONING AND OFTEN PERSECUTORY. WITH THE PSYCHOANALYST – IT’S ABOUT SELF-ACTUALIZATION. AND TO THE SCIENTIST IT IS DISCOVERY. EITHER APPROACH OR OUTCOME – IT’S LIKE OPENING A DOOR THAT LEADS TO ANOTHER REALM THAT EXISTS SIDE BY SIDE – YET ALL TOO OFTEN SEPARATE FROM THAT WHICH IS EMPIRICALLY FOUNDED OR UNDERSTOOD.

“GUIDED BY ONE’S GENITALIA”

YES, GOING THROUGH LIFE AS MY FATHER DID – PENIS- FIRST WAS ABOUT PLACING ONE’S SEXUAL GRATIFICATION BEFORE ONE’S PERSONAL AND FAMILIAL PROGRESSION; BEFORE THE ADVANCE OF ONE’S VOCATION AND IN PARTICULAR, BEFORE THE ELEVATION OF ONE’S PRIDE AND DIGNITY. FOR ME IT WAS AN ADOLESCENCE TEEMING WITH SELF-DEBASEMENT AND CONTROVERSY. HAVING BEEN REARED IN AN ATHEISTIC FAMILY WHO COMPLETELY LACKED MORAL AND ETHICAL BOUNDARIES; A CHILD WHO WAS MOLESTED AND OR SEXUALLY ABUSED AND HUMILIATED REPEATEDLY BY HIS OVERTLY PROMISCUOUS “MOM”, AT THE VULNERABLE AGE OF THIRTEEN I HAD ALREADY BEEN SUFFERING FROM SATYRIASIS FOR HALF A DECADE. AS SUCH I WAS OBSESSED WITH ANY AND ALL ROUTES AVAILABLE THAT WOULD LEAD ME TO AN ORGASM. TWENTY-FOUR HOURS PER DAY – SEVEN DAYS PER WEEK – I DID ALL I COULD TO CONTEND WITH A NEUROGENIC DISORDER THAT INVOLVED HYPERSENSITIVITY AND THE CONTINUOUS STIMULATION OF MY GENITALIA. AND REGARDLESS OF WHERE I WAS AND THE INAPPROPRIATENESS OF THE CIRCUMSTANCE – I WAS ALWAYS COMBATTING THE ADVANCEMENT OF AN ERECTION. UNLESS YOU’VE EXPERIENCED WHAT IT’S LIKE TO BE HAMPERED AND DEGRADED BY A HYPER-SEXUAL ADDICTION – YOU CAN’T POSSIBLY FATHOM IT’S ENERVATING EFFECT – AS WELL AS IT’S SHEAR DOMINANCE OVER YOU. AT THE TIME I HAD NO IDEA I WAS BEING SABOTAGED, HUMILIATED AND BY A SIGNIFICANT SEXUAL ABERRATION THAT WAS WREAKING HAVOC IN MY YOUNG LIFE. THE TRUTH OF THE MATTER WAS – I WAS TEETERING ON – BEING LABELED AN ADOLESCENT SEX OFFENDER; A HARMLESS ALBEIT ANNOYING SEX OFFENDER (WHO WAS NO RAPIST OR CHILD MOLESTER) YET WHO WAS IN DESPERATE NEED OF SOME SORT OF MAGICAL PHARMACEUTICAL BULLET TO RESTORE SOME SORT OF A . SEMBLANCE OF NORMALCY. I, HAVING BEEN THE VICTIM OF SEXUAL PREDATION BY STRANGER AND FAMILY ALIKE – WAS IN NEED OF COMPASSION, OF EMPATHY AND OF TREATMENT – NOT, I REPEAT PUNISHMENT NOR OF INCARCERATION. THIS CONCISE AND FRANK REVELATION MUST MUST NOT END WITH SHAME OR EMBARRASSMENT – BUT WITH THE IMPLICIT UNDERSTANDING THAT THOSE OF US WHO FALL VICTIM TO SEXUAL PREDATORS AND WHO NEVER ABUSE EITHER A CHILD NOR AN ADULT – MUST BE DIAGNOSED, TREATED AND NURTURED WITH A HEALTHY VIEW OF SEXUALITY. NO LABELS. NO STIGMATIZATION. NO DESTRUCTIVE SELF-FULFILLING PROPHESY. HEAL US OR DESTROY US – BUT DO NOT DRAG “IT” ON FOR AN ENTIRE LIFETIME.

IN THE COMPLETE ABSENCE OF LANGUAGE AND THE POSSIBLE PHENOMENON OF TABULA RASA – HOW DID EARLY MAN THINK? WITHOUT WORDS OR KNOWLEDGE – OR, AS ALLEGEDLY WITH A NEWBORN, WITHOUT INNATE IDEAS – HOW DID PRIMITIVE MAN UTILIZE HIS GIFT OF AFFLATUS? WERE WE NO DIFFERENT THAN LOWER FORMS OF ANIMALS? WAS THOUGHT MERELY A SERIES OF PICTURES? AS WITH LOWER FORMS OF FAUNA – DID WE MERELY EXPERIENCE HUNGER, THIRST AND FATIGUE – THE NEED TO SLEEP, BREATH, EAT, DRINK AND EVACUATE?

SO WHAT AND HOW WOULD AN EINSTEIN OF EARLY MAN HAVE TAKEN THE VERY FIRST CRUCIAL STEPS TOWARDS ADVANCEMENT? FIRE THAT CHANGED THE TEXTURE, TASTE AND NUTRITIONAL (AND BACTERIAL) CONTENT OF FOOD; THE FIRST PRIMITIVE SHELTER; THE EVENTUAL DOMESTICATION OF ANIMALS? AND AS WE EVOLVED INTELLECTUALLY AND TECHNOLOGICALLY – THERE WAS THE BRILLIANT CREATION OF CALCULUS WHICH WAS CERTAINLY NOT STUMBLED UPON ACCIDENTALLY. THE VERY FIRST ANTIBIOTIC, ANESTHETIC, THE “THEORETICAL” QUARK – EVEN THE DISCOVERY OR INVENTION OF WINDOW GLASS; WE CAN GO ON AND ON AND ON. AS CRAZY, VIOLENT AND CRAZY AS PEOPLE CAN BE – WE AS A SPECIES – GIVE RISE TO VERY SPECIAL INDIVIDUALS WHO ARE USUALLY ABLE TO SOMEHOW COMBAT MANKIND’S PRIMITIVE DARK SIDE – I SUPPOSE BY TAPPING INTO THAT SIXTH SENSE – GETTING ENIGMATICALLY INTO “THE ZONE”.

SO WHEN YOU’RE DOWN – DELVE INTO A BOOK ON LIFE AND ATTEMPT TO SOLVE SOME OF LIFE’S GREATEST MYSTERIES. LIFE IS FASCINATING EVEN AT IT’S LOWEST POINT. WHY ME? WHY US? HOW? WHERE AND WHEN? WHAT DOES THE FUTURE HOLD – TECHNOLOGICALLY – SOCIALLY – POLITICALLY – SPIRITUALLY?

WHAT’S A GROWN-UP?

SO WHAT IS AN ADULT AND HOW AND WHY DO I BELIEVE AFTER 50 YEARS OF LIFE THAT I CONSIDER MYSELF FINALLY – NEARLY GROWN-UP? OF COURSE GROWN-UP’S CAN STAND ON THEIR OWN TWO FEET AND NATURALLY THAT MEANS THAT SUPPORTING YOURSELF (MYSELF) IS A CRITICAL ASPECT OF BEING AN EMOTIONALLY MATURE PERSON.

YES – I STILL MAKE MISTAKES WHILE CONTENDING WITH PEOPLE AND CONFRONTING SOMETIMES ARDUOUS PROBLEMS. THERE ARE TIME ADMITTEDLY WHEN I SPEAK AND ACT BEFORE ENGAGING MY BRAIN. BUT BEING AN ADULT ALSO INCLUDES HAVING MADE ERRORS IN JUDGMENT AND I SUPPOSE RATHER THAN BEING IN DENIAL – A CRUCIAL PART OF BEING AN ADULT IS TO ADMIT TO YOUR MISTAKES AND TO AT LEAST MAKE A SINCERE EFFORT TO FIND PRACTICAL SOLUTIONS. BEING AN ADULT MEANS FIRST RECOGNIZING AND ATTEMPTING TO REMEDY YOUR RATHER OBVIOUS FLAWS. CONSEQUENTLY – HAVING MINIMIZED MY INTERACTION WITH PEOPLE FOR THE MAJORITY OF MY LIFE I NOW (AT AGE 54) AM (USUALLY) SINCERELY CONCERNED WITH THOSE I EVEN SUPERFICIALLY ENCOUNTER. SO IT’S NO LONGER ABOUT SUPERFICIAL PERFUNCTORY PLEASANTRIES. ALL OF WHICH IS DUE TO THE FACT THAT FINALLY – FOLLOWING FIVE DECADES OF LIFE – I HAVE BEGUN TO BOTH LIKE AND RESPECT MYSELF AND AS SUCH I HAVE AN INTRINSIC CONCERN FOR OTHERS. (ALL DESPITE WHAT EMOTIONALLY DAMAGED DRUG ADDICTS, ALCOHOLICS, REDNECKS AND HATE MONGERS HAVE DONE TO ME.) YES, I SEE MYSELF FOR WHO I AM – AN OVERWEIGHT, BALDING PARANOID SCHIZOPHRENIC – WHO IS A TEMPORARY BURDEN ON SOCIETY – WHO IS DOING EVERYTHING HE (I) CAN TO ONE DAY (SOON) WITH THE HELP OF GOD AND THE KINDNESS OF STRANGERS – TO STAND ON HIS OWN TWO FEET. I, AS AN ALLEGED GROWN-UP, SPEND AT LEAST A PORTION OF MY TIME COMBATTING MIDDLE-AGE SPREAD AND A METABOLISM THAT HAS CONSIDERABLY SLOWED – CREATING A BODY IN GENERAL THAT HAS TRULY SEEN BETTER DAYS. NOW, MORE THAN EVER, AS A MIDDLE-AGED MALE – I BIDE TIME CONSTRUCTIVELY – STUDYING A VARIETY OF SUBJECTS. AND ALONG THE WAY I’M ATTEMPTING TO ASSEMBLE A LEXICON THAT WOULD MAKE PROUD EVEN THE MOST DILIGENT SAVANT OR SCHOLAR. LARGE OR SMALL, RELEVANT OR IRRELEVANT – I SIMPLY DO MY BEST TO NO LONGER LET PROBLEMS PHASE ME. I WORK AT THEM WITH AS MUCH LOGIC AND PRUDENCE AS I CAN AND THEN I SIMPLY HAND THEM OVER TO GOD. I DO WHAT I CAN TO NOT OVERREACT TO WHAT LIFE METER’S-OUT. I DO MY BEST TO LET LIFE’S TRAVAIL TO AID ME IN PERSONAL GROWTH. I AM NOW ALLEGEDLY AS AN ADULT – CAPABLE OF SEEING ALL SIDES OF AN ISSUE. I’M ATTEMPTING TO FACE FEAR WITH REASON – HATE WITH TOLERANCE – AND SUSPICION WITH INTUITION AND PERCIPIENCE. I REALIZE NOW THAT NO ONE TENET HAS ALL OF THE ANSWERS DESPITE EVEN THE MOST THOROUGH EXEGESIS OR COMMENTARY. (OF COURSE THIS VIEWPOINT IS CONSIDERED BY SOME AS HERETICAL, “APOSTATICAL” – PERHAPS EVEN BLASPHEMOUS). IT IS SIMPLY MY TRUTH – MY UNDERSTANDING. MY WELL INTENTION (PERHAPS FLAWED) GOAL IS TO CONTINUALLY PROGRESS UNTIL OLD AGE OR INFIRMITY SUPPLANTS MY INNATE PROPENSITY TO THRIVE. BEING AN ADULT TO ME – IS THE RECOGNITION THAT MONEY IS ONLY AS GOOD AS THE SUCCOR IT CAN BRING TO THE IMPOSITIONED MASSES; FEEDING THE HUNGRY, SHELTERING THE HOMELESS, HEALING THE INFIRM; YES HELPING THOSE WHO ARE WILLING TO HELP THEMSELVES. YES, EXTENDING, SALVAGING, PRESERVING LIFE FOR EVEN THE ANONYMOUS MULTITUDES – EVEN FOR THOSE WHO ARE NOT DESERVING OF IT – ESPECIALLY AS YOU FACE THE EVENTIDE, WANE OR EBB OF YOUR RAPIDLY DECLINING LIFE – WILL LEAVE BEHIND A LEGACY THAT IS BOTH ENDURING AND INCOMPARABLE. BECAUSE – TO ME – IT’S ALL ABOUT EXTENDING, MAINTAINING AND PERPETUATING LIFE. IT IS ABOUT A SIMPLE REVERENCE FOR LIFE – LIFE THAT IS NATURE AND GOD’S ILLIMITABLE AND MYSTERIOUS CANVAS.

RECIDIVISM

SO WHO AND WHAT WARRANTS A SECOND OPPORTUNITY AND WHY? WHEN DO WE RESPOND TO THE LAW BREAKER WITH COMPASSION AND EMPATHY? WHEN DO WE RESPOND OR VIE FOR PUNITORY RESPONSE ? AND WHEN DO WE SIMPLY GET “THEM” OFF THE STREETS? HOW DO WE DETERMINE WHEN SOMEONE IS DANGEROUS, SOCIO OR PSYCHOPATHIC AND RECLINED TO BECOME RECIDIVISTIC? SO WHAT IN GOD’S NAME DO WE DO WITH THE CHRONIC DRUG ABUSER? (TREAT THEM – OR INCARCERATE THEM? IT SEEMS THAT THERE ARE JUST TOO DAMN MANY SCREWED-UP DANGEROUS INDIVIDUALS LIVING AMONG US TO PROPERLY, LOGICALLY AND FISCALLY TO CONTEND WITH. AND WE ALREADY HAVE MORE PEOPLE PER CAPITA WHO ARE INCARCERATED AND FELONS WHO ARE LIVING IN FREEDOM THAN ANY OTHER MODERN SOPHISTICATED COUNTRY ON THE PLANET. AND THIS IS MERELY A FRACTION OF THOSE WHO ARE EVENTUALLY PROSECUTED, FOUND GUILTY OF A PARTICULAR OFFENSE AND JAILED OR IMPRISONED. NO MATTER THE PROPER APPROPRIATE COURSE – I SUPPOSE THAT WE MUST AT LEAST ATTEMPT TO TREAT THEM AS INDIVIDUALS AND NOT TO LUMP THEM TOGETHER IN ONE SINGLE TOXIC – YES RISKY MASS. THE PROBLEM AS I SEE IT IS TO SEPARATE THOSE WHO CAN BE REHABILITATED AND OR REFORMED FROM THE INCORRIGIBLE IS A VERY COMPLEX EXPENSIVE AND TIME CONSUMING PROCESS. IT TAKES JOBS, TRAINING AND OR EDUCATION AND PERHAPS LONG-TERM THERAPY TO AT LEAST ATTEMPT TO REFORM THE TRULY DYSFUNCTIONAL PERSONALITY. EVEN FOR THE EXPERIENCE ERUDITE PSYCHOLOGIST OR PSYCHOLOGIST (OR JUDGE) FINDS IT VERY CHALLENGING TO CREATE SOME SORT OF A CRITERION, STANDARD OR BENCHMARK. FORGIVE ME FOR MY SKEPTICISM BUT BUT EVEN UNDERSTANDING THE HUMAN MIND IN ALL OF IT’S INTRICACY AND UNPREDICTABILITY IS NOT EASILY ASSESSED, REPAIRED OR MODIFIED. UNLIKE THE DEFECTIVE SOFTWARE OF A COMPUTER- THE PROCESS OF REPROGRAMMING OR DEPROGRAMING CAN BE A LESSON IN FUTILITY. HOWEVER IT IS MY SINCERE BELIEF THAT EVEN “SOCIOPATHIC DRUG ADDICTS” – WHOSE MYOPIC SIGHTS ARE CONTINUALLY DIRECTED TOWARDS THE OBSESSIVE NEED TO BENUMB AND TO ESCAPE – TO SATIATE AN EMOTIONAL AND PHYSIOLOGICAL ADDICTION – CAN (ONCE CLEAN AND SOBER) BECOME DECENT SENSITIVE – EVEN TRUSTWORTHY ADULTS. SO WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE BRAIN CHEMISTRY OF AN ADDICT WHO APPEARS TO LACK ANY MORAL OR ETHICAL CONSTRAINTS AND SOMEONE WHO HAS KICKED HIS OR HER DESTRUCTIVE ALL-CONSUMING HABIT? PERHAPS THIS INQUIRY IS BETTER LEFT TO THE SCIENTIST – HOW MIGHT UNDERSTANDING THIS PHENOMENON AID US IN COMPREHENDING AND PERHAPS RESTORING OR RECTIFYING THE SOCIOPATHIC OR PSYCHOPATHIC MIND? (ISN’T THE RECIDIVISTIC SEX OFFENDER WHO RE-OFFENDS – WHO IS IN ESSENCE GUILTY OF TRANSFORMING AN INNOCENT CHILD OR WOMAN INTO A “TOY” – PLAGUED BY A SOCIOPATHIC MIND? DOESN’T THE BEHAVIOR OF SOMEONE WHO PLACES SEXUAL GRATIFICATION BEFORE THE HEALTH AND WELL BEING OF A PRECIOUS INNOCENT LIFE – TRANSLATE INTO OR REFLECT A SOCIOPATHIC ETHOS OR MENTALITY? IS ANYONE WHO LOSES HIS OR HER CHERISHED RESIDENCE ( INTENDED TO SHELTER HIS OR HER BELOVED FAMILY) NOT SEVERELY INCAPACITATED DUE TO A BIOCHEMICAL BRAIN ABNORMALITY? ANYONE WITH AN ADDICTIVE PERSONALITY OR SOCIOPATHIC MIND MUST BE BOTH STUDIED AND COMPLETELY UNDERSTOOD. MAYBE WE SHOULD BEGIN BY STUDYING THE REFORMED ADDICT OR FORMER “REHABILITATED” CRIMINAL – BEFORE TREATMENT AND WITH A THOROUGH SUBSEQUENT FOLLOW-UP? VIOLENT OFFENDERS OBVIOUSLY MUST BE KEPT OFF THE STREETS NOT AS MUCH AS AN ISSUE OF PUNISHMENT OR RECRIMINATION – BUT TO CLOISTER OR SEQUESTER THEM IN ORDER TO PROTECT SOCIETY. THERE IS A SIGNIFICANT PERCENTAGE OF FELONS WHO ARE IMPRISONED DUE TO DRUG ABUSE AND OR SALES – SO AT LEAST ATTEMPTING TO REMEDY OR ADDRESS ADDICTION FROM A PHYSIOLOGICAL POINT OF VIEW – IS WORTHY OF A SIGNIFICANT EXPENDITURE OF RESOURCES. BUT FIRST WE MUST PROMPTLY CEASE THE FUNDING OF PROGRAMS OR RESEARCH THAT IS INTENDED TO DOCUMENT AND TO UNDERSTAND THE MATING HABITS OF THE UBIQUITOUS ANNOYING COCKROACH. THE LOFTY – BUT I BELIEVE – PERFECTLY ACHIEVABLE GOAL – IS TO NOT ONLY TO DEVELOP CHEMOTHERAPY TO REMEDY THE PERVASIVE DISORDERS OF THE “AILING” IMBALANCED MIND – IT IS MORE ABOUT FOCUSING ON THE PROPHYLACTIC APPROACH. MANY SCIENTISTS MAY STRONGLY DISAGREE WITH THIS POSIT – BUT THE MIND OF THE FETUS OR EMBRYO – WHEN SUPPLIED WITH ADEQUATE NUTRITION AND NOT EXPOSED TO TOXIC WASTE RESULTING FROM TOBACCO, DRUG OR ALCOHOL USE – PRESCRIPTION OR OVER-THE-COUNTER DRUGS – WILL RESULT IN A HEALTHY VIABLE “NORMAL” BRAIN – IF NOT SUBJECTED TO UNDUE STRESS AND A MULTITUDE OF OTHER FACTORS – PERPETRATED BY A DYSFUNCTIONAL MOM AND THE FUTURE IN A VIOLENCE-RIDDEN ENVIRONMENT FILLED WITH HOPELESSNESS AND RESIGNATION.

SORRY TO BE SO PEDANTIC BUT (FOR THE “ADULT” ADDICT) LEARNING TO SOLVE PROBLEMS IS A CRITICAL ASPECT OF THEIR PERSONAL GROWTH. THEY MUST LEARN THAT ESCAPING INTO A DRUG OR ALCOHOL-INDUCED STUPOR DOES NOT PERMIT YOU TO GROW INTO A MATURE ADULT. IF THEY ARE COMBATTING FEELINGS OF DISCOMFITURE – THEY MUST BRING THOSE FEELINGS OUT INTO THE OPEN; TO LEARN THAT THEIR INTRINSIC SENSITIVITY IS ACCEPTABLE; THAT FEELING FOR OTHERS IS AN ESSENTIAL AND OR SIGNIFICANT ASPECT OF BECOMING AN A ADULT. LEARNING TO EMOTE OR LAMENT IS NOT TO CHARACTERIZED BY THEMSELVES OR THEIR FAMILY MEMBERS AS BEING A WIMP. AS I HAVE ALREADY STATED MANY TIMES IN THE PAST – THE FOLLOWING APPROACHES WILL HELP THEM TO HEAL:

1) ADOPTING A CAUSE – SUCH AS ASSISTING CHILDREN WHO ARE DEALING WITH A POTENTIALLY LETHAL ILLNESS.

2) FINDING AND NURTURING INTERESTS AND OR TALENTS.

3) SETTING ACHIEVABLE GOALS THAT WILL DIRECTLY ASSIST IN THE HEALING PROCESS. SUCH AS CREATING APPRENTICESHIP PROGRAMS IN

DRUG OR ALCOHOL COUNSELING, AIDING THE ELDERLY OR MENTALLY CHALLENGED; ASSISTING THE EDUCATIONAL PROCESS IN DAYCARE, OR PRESCHOOL.

4) ENROLLING THEM IN TAI CHI, YOGA OR MARTIAL ARTS.

5)FOR THOSE WHO ARE INTERESTED – TO HELP THEM TO GET IN TOUCH WITH THEIR SPIRITUAL NATURE.

6) FINDING AN OUTLET FOR AFFLATUS. GUIDE THEM TOWARDS MUSIC, ART, SPORTS, LITERATURE, MOVIES, ENTERTAINMENT AND OR TO FIND AND TO DEVELOP A HOBBY. . – HELP THEM TO LAUGH; TO FEEL, TO EXPRESS THEIR ARTISTIC SIDE.

7) CREATE A PLACE WHERE THEY CAN FIND FRIENDS, COMPATIBILITY, RELATEDNESS.

8) PERHAPS THEY COULD VOLUNTEER (SUCH AS BECOMING A FIREMAN).

(JUST A BIT MORE STUFF TO THINK ABOUT)

LIVING IN A PLURALISTIC SOCIETY

SO YOU DON’T LIKE FAGS, QUEERS, HOMO’S, DYKES, LESBO’S, TRANSSEXUALS, BISEXUALS, HERMAPHRODITES OR TRANSVESTITES? I SUPPOSE THAT YOU DON’T LIKE KICKS, SPADES, CHINKS OR GOOKS, MUSLIM’S, JEW’S, HINDU’S, OR BUDDHIST’S EITHER? WHAT YOU LIKE ARE HETEROSEXUAL, ANGLO SAXON, CAUCASIAN, ENGLISH-SPEAKING, AMERICAN’S WHO EMBRACE MAINSTREAM CHRISTIANITY. WHY CAN’T WE ALL LOOK THE VERY SAME – AND TO BELIEVE THE VERY SAME THINGS? IT’S THE VERY LEAST THAT WE COULD DO WHILE LIVING IN A FREE DEMOCRATIC REPUBLIC WHO BOASTS WHO BOASTS IT’S EMBRACE OF PLURALITY OF RELIGION, PLURALITY OF RACE, DIVERSITY OF NATIONAL ORIGIN. THE LEAST WE COULD DO IS TO ALL LOOK AND ACT ALIKE. THE LEAST…

FELICITY

HOW WE LIVE – WE GO THROUGH LIFE – BEING MISERABLE OR CHOOSING TO BE HAPPY – IS ALL ABOUT ATTITUDE. IF YOU ARE NEGATIVE AND CONFLICTIVE IN NATURE – YOU WILL INVARIABLY GO AGAINST THE FLOW. IF YOU APPROACH EACH DAY AS AN OPTIMIST – LIFE WILL USUALLY BE THERE FOR YOUR BENEFIT – FOR THAT OF YOUR FAMILY MEMBERS. IF YOU’RE POOR YET SPIRITUAL – SAGACIOUS ENOUGH TO ESCHEW MATERIALISM – LIFE CAN AND WILL BRING YOU HAPPINESS. IF YOU LIVE ON A A HEALTHY YET FRUGAL DIET OF BEANS AND RICE, FRUITS, VEGETABLES, EGGS AND DAIRY – TO THOSE WHO ARE TRULY BEING DEPRIVED OF A SUBSISTENCE – TO THEM YOUR RUDIMENTARY DIET IS NOTHING SHORT OF A BANQUET. AND TO THE SICK AND OR MALNOURISHED – YOUR HEALTH IS A GIFT FROM, GOD. IF YOU HAVE A ROOF OVER YOUR HEAD AND A RELATIVELY COMFORTABLE BED TO SLEEP IN – TAKE A MOMENT EACH AND EVERY NIGHT TO BE THANKFUL TO GOD AND APPRECIATIVE OF THE FACT THAT YOU LIVE IN THE GREATEST COUNTRY ON THE GLOBE. BE THANKFUL THAT YOU ARE NOT AMONG THE HORDES OF PEOPLE ( IN THE U.S. ALONE) WHO MUST FACE THE MERCURIAL SOMETIMES HARSH AND UNFORGIVING) WEATHER, THE VEXING INTRUSIVENESS OF A DIURNAL HUNGER PANG. FOR THOSE OF YOU BLESSED WITH A FAMILY – YOU HAVE THE GREAT HONOR AND PRIVILEGE OF SHARING A BOND WITH YOUR FAMILY. YOU, AS A FAMILY UNIT, CAN AND DO HAVE WHAT IS COMPLETELY LACKING IN LIFE FOR THOSE OF INCAPABLE OF FINDING A SPOUSE – THE ABILITY TO TACKLE LIFE AS A UNIT, AS A COGNATE. THAT WHICH IMPEDES THE FLOW OF LIFE (SUCH AS HATE OR ENVY) VITIATES OR BEFOULS THE GOOD, IT EXACERBATES OR WORSENS THE BAD. AND PLEASE KEEP IN MIND THROUGHOUT IT ALL:

YOUR HUSBAND IS A god.

YOUR WIFE IS A goddess.

YOUR CHILDREN – A BLESSING.

YOUR LIFE – A WONDROUS MIRACLE.

LESSONS

SO WHAT EXACTLY HAVE I LEARNED FOLLOWING FIFTY-FIVE YEARS OF LIFE? JUST THAT A WELL MEANINGFUL GOAL TO CHANGE A FRIEND, A MATE, A HUSBAND OR A WIFE – IS ALL TOO OFTEN A WASTE OF TIME AND OF ENERGY. FOR INSTANCE – I HAVE A GOOD FRIEND WHO IS “PATHOLOGICALLY CHEAP” – AN UNATTRACTIVE PERSONALITY TRAIT THAT IS SECURELY ENTRENCHED IN HIS MENTALITY OR PSYCHE. IT IS QUITE SIMPLY AN UNAPPEALING ASPECT OF HIS COMPLEX (BUT ESSENTIALLY GOOD AND KIND) NATURE. EVEN CONFRONTING HIM GENTLY, TACTFULLY ONLY ELICITS ANGER AND OR RESENTMENT. AS FOR THOSE I LIVE WITH AT THE FOSTER CARE FACILITY FOR THE MENTALLY ILL – DESPITE THE FACT THAT EVERYONE IS OVER A HALF-A-CENTURY IN AGE – THEY, TO THIS DAY – POSSESS THE PERSONALITY TRAITS AND THE HABITS OF A FIVE YEAR-OLD. EVERYONE HAS ISSUES WITH HYGIENE; NO ONE CAN PROPERLY OR MATURELY HANDLE A BOWEL MOVEMENT; NO ONE IS WILLING (DESPITE ALL THE LEISURE TIME IN THE WORLD) TO SIMPLY CLEANUP AFTER THEMSELVES. AND GOD HELP US (ME) WHEN THE TOILET CLOGS – BECAUSE EVEN ATTEMPTING TO TEACH THEM HOW TO USE A TOOL – DESPITE IT’S SIMPLICITY – IS AGAIN – AN EFFORT IN FUTILITY. TO THIS DAY I’M UNCERTAIN AS TO THE SOURCE OF THIS PROBLEM – IT CAN BE TO THEIR INTELLECTUAL DEFICITS, SHEAR LAZINESS OR, PERHAPS MERELY DEFIANCE OR CONTUMACY. I WILL AT LEAST ATTEMPT TO INDOCTRINATE THEM OVER THE YEARS TO COME – BUT JUST AS WITH THE CRIMINAL RECIDIVIST, THE RELAPSE OF THE ALCOHOLIC OR DRUG ADDICT – AND YES, AS WITH THE IRAQI’S – IF, FOLLOWING A DELIBERATE PROPERLY

CONCEIVED APPROACH – IMPLEMENTED OVER A LONG PERIOD OF TIME – IF YOU (IF WE) CANNOT BRING ABOUT CHANGE OR GROWTH – THEN FRANKLY, IT DOES NOT LOOK PROMISING. SOMETIMES – DESPITE YOUR BEST EFFORTS – THE ADDICT OR ALCOHOLIC WILL RELAPSE, THE CRIMINAL WILL RE-OFFEND – YES, THE YOUNG BURGEONING DEMOCRATIC POLITY OF IRAQ (MAY DOWN THE ROAD) SADLY, MAY BECOME OBSTRUCTED BY DISAFFECTION, EVEN ANARCHY FOLLOWED BY DESPOTIC RULE. I CAN AND WILL ACCEPT THE EMOTIONAL, INTELLECTUAL AND HABITUAL DEFICIENCIES OF MY MENTALLY ILL ROOMMATES – SIMPLY BECAUSE I DO NOT HAVE THE TIME, ENERGY NOR THE RESOURCES TO IMPLEMENT LONG-TERM CHANGE IN THEM. AS FOR IRAQ (CULTURAL RELATIVITY AND RELIGIOSITY ASIDE) WELL – IF THEY HAVEN’T YET LEARNED HOW TO MAINTAIN SELF-RULE, SELF-DETERMINATION FOLLOWING A DECADE OF ASSISTANCE BY THE U.S. AND IT’S NATO ALLIES, WELL OVER A TRILLION DOLLARS IN TAX REVENUES AND THE LOSS AND DEPRECIATION OF FAR TOO MANY HUMAN LIVES – THEN – JUST AS WITH MY ROOMMATES – IT PROBABLY AIN’T GONNA HAPPEN.

THE WORLD WAS THEIRS TO DISCOVER

IT WOULD NO DOUBT HAVE BEEN A CEREBRAL YES SCIENTIFIC BANQUET FOR THE ALBERT EINSTEIN’S OF THE WORLD – HAVING BEEN BORN AT SOME TIME IN THE SEVENTEENTH OR EIGHTEENTH CENTURY – THE OBVIOUS PROBLEM’S AS I SEE IT – MIGHT BE THE FUNDING OR BACKING OF RESEARCH, MAINTAINING A SUBSISTENCE, THE ABSENCE OF CONTEMPORARY LIBRARIES AND READING GLASSES – ALL OF WHICH MIGHT COALESCE TO THWART OR STYMY ANY NOETIC PURSUITS. JUST HOW MANY BRILLIANT PEOPLE LOST THEIR INTENDED PURPOSE IN LIFE – HAVING BEEN RELEGATED TO THE POSITION OF DISENFRANCHISED SLAVE, PEON, INDENTURED SERVANT – YES, THOSE CURSED WITH POOR VISION – OR SIMPLY HAVING BEEN BORN A FEMALE OR A NEGRO? MORE IS THE PITY.

“ILLEGALS”

THE REASON POLITICIAN’S/LEADER’S LOOK THE OTHER WAY REGARDING THE INFLUX OF ILLEGALS INTO THIS COUNTRY IS DUE TO THE “PROBABILITY” THAT THEIR “ILLEGAL PRESENCE” BENEFITS THE WEALTHY, FARMERS, LANDLORDS, RETAILERS – THE ECONOMY IN GENERAL. THEY INCREASE GDP AND OVERALL – NATIONAL INCOME. WHAT A DILEMMA.

“YES, ALL I WANT TO DO IS TO HELP”

OKAY, LABEL ME AN ANOMIC, AN ICONOCLAST – WHATEVER YOU CALL ME – I SUPPOSE I DON’T ENTIRELY UNDERSTAND YOU AND YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND (OR TRUST) ME. I SUPPOSE THAT WE SIMPLY LOOK AT THINGS DIFFERENTLY. WHAT I PERCEIVE AS EXCESSIVENESS – YOU MIGHT CHARACTERIZE AS AS SIMPLY THE YIELD OR UPSHOT OF FREE ENTERPRISE; AS WHAT YOU WOULD DEFINE OF A BYPRODUCT OF SIMPLY EXPLOITING THE FREE ENTERPRISE SYSTEM; THE BOON OF INNOVATIVENESS AND HARD WORK. YOU, THE VERY WEALTHY – VIEW YOUR EXPENSIVE MANSIONS AND MATERIALISTIC INUNDATION AS MERE RECOMPENSE FOR A JOB WELL DONE – YET ALL TOO OFTEN – A SUCCESS – AN EXORBITANT WEALTH – YOU ACHIEVED WITHOUT REGARD FOR THOSE WHO BEAR THE PHYSICAL BURDEN; MANY OF WHOM – MEMBER’S OF THE PROLETARIAT – ARE LIVING PAYCHECK TO PAYCHECK TO SUPPORT BOTH THEMSELVES AND THEIR FAMILIES – WORKERS OR EMPLOYEES WHOSE TRAVAIL MEANS LITTLE OR NOTHING TO MANY OF YOU. INNOCENT CHILDREN DIE A SLOW DEATH DUE TO STARVATION CAUSED BY INDIFFERENCE; HELPLESS CHILDREN COMBAT POTENTIALLY LIFE-THREATENING DISEASES AND FAR TOO MANY OF YOU MAKE A DELIBERATE WELL THOUGHT-OUT DECISION TO CHOOSE OR SELECT YOUR ACQUISITIONS OVER AIDING – PERHAPS EVEN SAVING PRECIOUS LIVES. SO YOU’VE NOW LABELED ME A COMMUNIST OR A SOCIALIST (OR PERHAPS SIMPLY AN ASSHOLE). THESE LABELS ARE A DISTRACTION FROM THE TRUTH – THE FACT THAT MANY OF YOU SADLY NEED STUFF TO GIVE YOU PURPOSE IN LIFE; TO FEEL IMPORTANT; TO FEEL SUPERIOR; TO FEEL ALIVE; YES – TO SIMPLY FEEL.

(AND I, AS A FREE AMERICAN – WHO IS SIMPLY EXERCISING HIS PREROGATIVE BY UTILIZING HIS RIGHT TO FREE SPEECH – YES TO CONVEY HIS (MY) OPINION – SHOULD NOT ONLY BE BACKED BY YOU CONCEPTUALLY (DESPITE YOU DISGUST OR ANIMUS WITH ME) – YOU SHOULD BE READILY, WILLING AND ABLE – AS ANY AMERICAN PATRIOT – TO FIGHT FOR MY PRIVILEGE TO EXERCISE MY FREE SPEECH RIGHTS.)

YOU CAN BELIEVE THAT I’M FULL OF SHIT – BUT IN THE FUTURE I WILL ABSTAIN FROM ACQUIRING A ROLEX WATCH, LAVISH MANSIONS, AN OSTENTATIOUS YACHT. I WILL DELIBERATELY ESCHEW AN ASSORTMENT OF EGO OR STATUS-PRODUCING CRUDE. I WILL – HOWEVER ONCE I AM FINANCIALLY ABLE – SMOKE A GOOD CIGAR EVERY WEEK OR TWO; I WILL OCCASIONALLY IMBIBE COGNAC; AS MUCH AS I LOVE GOOD FOOD – HOWEVER – JUST A BIT DOWN THE ROAD – I WILL EAT TO LIVE AND NOT LIVE TO EAT. I WILL CLEAN MY OWN TOILET AND I WILL DIRECT THE BRUNT OF MY WEALTH TOWARDS KNOCKING-DOWN OUR OBSCENE NATIONAL DEBT. I WILL AID THOSE WHO ARE DESERVING OF ASSISTANCE; AND I WILL DERIVE SATISFACTION BY HELPING PEOPLE – IMPROVING THE QUALITY OF LIFE FOR MILLIONS OF DESERVING MEMBER’S OF OUR HUMAN COMMUNITY. I WILL EXTEND MY PROCLIVITY FOR LARGESS EVEN BEYOND THE EFFORTS OF TRUE AMERICAN PATRIOTS AND BENEFACTORS – SUCH AS MR. BUFFET, MR. TED TURNER AND MR. BILL GATES. YES, I WILL PLEASE GOD; I WILL ENHANCE MY CONTINUALLY EVOLVING INTRINSIC NATURE AS AN ALTRUIST. I WILL BOLSTER MY COMMUNITY AND SUPPORT THE EVOLUTION AND MATURATION OF MY GREAT COUNTRY. AGAIN COMBATTING OUR NATIONAL DEBT, BUREAUCRATIC WASTE AND STRIVING TOWARDS THE UNIFICATION AND RESPECT OF BOTH THE RICH AND POOR. I WILL DIE AN OLD MAN WHO IS PROUD OF HIS ROLE AS A CONTRIBUTING MEMBER OF THE HUMAN RACE; KNOWING THAT I CONTROLLED THE ANIMATE AND THAT THE ANIMATE DID NOT CURIOUSLY CONTROL ME.

MAYBE WE SHOULD JUST WAIT?

I SUPPOSE I JUST DON’T KNOW WHAT TO MAKE OF IT; I TRULY BELIEVE IN GOD ALMIGHTY, BUT THOSE WHO EAT, DRINK AND ESPOUSE RELIGION TWENTY-FOUR HOURS PER DAY – SEVEN DAYS PER WEEK – WELL I SUPPOSE EVEN FOR THE DEVOUT THEIST – IT CAN BE JUST A BIT OVERWHELMING. THOSE EITHER CURSED OR BLESSED WITH A MYOPIC VISION – SEEM TO ME TO BE JUST A BIT “OFF”. THERE’S MORE TO LIFE THAN RELIGIOSITY. THERE’S AN ENTIRE UNIVERSE – A GALAXY OF INFORMATION, OF THEORETICAL POSITS AND OR CONUNDRUMS TO INSPIRE EVEN THE INCURIOUS. HOWEVER – ONCE YOU HAVE PLACED YOUR LIFE AND I SUPPOSE THE ENTIRE FUTURE OF MANKIND INTO THE (YES) CAPABLE HANDS OF GOD – THE ONCE ESSENTIAL OBJECTIVE TO SAVE THE WORLD CAN (AND IS ALL TOO OFTEN) MERCILESSLY FLUSHED DOWN THE TOILET. WHY BUST YOUR GUT WHEN ALL YOU NEED TO FURTHER OUR INDIVIDUAL AND COLLECTIVE PROGRESSION IS A SINCERE ECUMENICAL SPIRIT – A SINCERE BELIEF IN A HIGHER POWER AND A PROPENSITY FOR PROSELYTIZATION TO ACCOMPLISH WHAT IS NECESSARY TO FURTHER MANKIND? WHAT’S THE POINT? JUST THAT HUMANITARIANISM, PHILANTHROPY – ANY BELIEF OR BEHAVIOR THAT ATTEMPTS TO ALTER OR MODIFY – TO IMPROVE THE HUMAN CONDITION – CAN BE PERCEIVED AS A MISAPPROPRIATION OF TIME, OF RESOURCES AND OF ENERGY. WHY ATTEMPT TO TACKLE LETHAL DISEASES, FAMINE, ILLITERACY, POVERTY, HATE OR A SEEMINGLY BOUNDLESS AND DIVERSE VARIETY OF PHYSICAL, SOCIAL, POLITICAL AND PSYCHOLOGICAL AILMENTS THAT PLAGUE THE HUMAN RACE? ONCE GOD HAS ARRIVED HE WILL NO DOUBT RESCUE US FROM OUR OWN STUPIDITY AND SELF-CENTEREDNESS. WHY BOTHER TO EVEN ATTEMPT ALL OF THE “NONSENSE” WHEN HEAVEN, PARADISE, YES THE RAPTURE AWAITS THE “TRUE BELIEVER”? WHY EVEN BOTHER TO CURE THE CHILD WHOSE BODY HAS BEEN INVADED OR RAVAGED BY A MALEVOLENT CANCER – WHEN AN ETERNITY IN UTOPIA AWAITS HER? WHY? WHY? WHY? SO? KICK BACK AND PUT YOUR FEET UP. DISREGARD OUR INEFFECTIVE TECHNIQUES DIRECTED TOWARDS FIGHTING CRIME, ILLITERACY, HUNGER, POVERTY, DISEASE, NATIONAL AND OR GLOBAL DEBT AND FANATICS WHOSE SOLE OBJECTIVE IN LIFE IS TO ALLEGEDLY ENGAGE IN AN ACT OF RECRIMINATION OR VINDICTIVENESS FOR SO CALLED IMPERIALISTIC HEGEMONIC OBJECTIVES AND OUR CURIOUS PROPENSITY FOR GETTING OURSELVES INTO PYRRHIC CONFLICTS. YES PUT YOUR FEET UP AND STANDBY IDLY AS THE WORLD DISINTEGRATES INTO A BLOODY PANDAEMONIUM.

AND WAIT. AND WAIT. AND WAIT.

(THIS FROM A (YES, HYPOCRITICAL) CHRISTIAN WHO IS AN UNEQUIVOCAL WORK IN PROGRESS – A POLEMICIST, A POLITICAL ACTIVIST AND – A PARANOID SCHIZOPHRENIC)

YES, GOD DOES INDEED HELP THOSE WHO HELP THEMSELVES.

CONSCIOUSNESS

DOES CONSCIOUSNESS HAVE A PHYSIOLOGICAL BASIS?

DOES IT HAVE WEIGHT OR MASS?

IF WE HAD THE TECHNOLOGY WHAT WOULD IT LOOK LIKE AND WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A PERSON WHO IS ALIVE AND A PERSON WHO IS DEAD?

TAKING ON PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY.

SO? WHAT WOULD THIS WORLD (THIS COUNTRY) BE LIKE IF EACH OF US SIMPLY ACTED AS MATURE RESPONSIBLE ADULTS? WHAT IF SO MANY OF US WOULD GET OFF OF OUR BACKSIDES AND JUST PULL OUR OWN WEIGHT?

NO IRRESPONSIBLE SEX THAT MAKES OFTEN DEFECTIVE BABIES WHO CANNOT BE SUPPORTED BY EITHER PARENT.

NO SMOKING.

NO OVEREATING COINCIDING WITH EXERCISE AND A REASONABLE HEALTHY DIET.

DOING EVERYTHING WITHIN YOUR POWER TO BE EMPLOYED – PAYING TAXES – BEING REASONABLY (RELATIVELY) GENEROUS?

WHAT IF EACH OF US TOOK ON A PHILOSOPHICAL STANCE THAT EMBRACES HONESTY AND INTEGRITY?

LITTLE, MODERATE TO NO CONSUMPTION OF ALCOHOL.

NO ILLICIT DRUG USE.

NO SPREAD OR TRANSMISSION OF DISEASE – OF A SEXUAL OR ASEXUAL NATURE.

NO HATRED, BIGOTRY OR PREJUDICE;

TO LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR – TO TURN THE OTHER CHEEK – TO PRACTICE FORBEARANCE.

WHAT IF WE CIVILLY DEBATED, DISCUSSED AND THEN WERE WILLING TO COMPROMISE IN THE NAME OF PRODUCTIVITY?

NO FRIVOLOUS LAWSUITS.

LAWFULNESS – SELF-RESTRAINT – AGAIN, WHILE EMBRACING A STRONG WORK ETHIC?

AND IF YOU (WE) WERE ABLE TO – RATHER THAN DUMPING YOUR ELDERLY PARENTS IN A NURSING HOME – WHAT IF WE AS CHILDREN, AS SIBLINGS, AS RELATIVES – SIMPLY TOOK ON THE RESPONSIBILITY – ACCEPTED THE FINANCIAL BURDEN – FOR TENDING TO THE NEEDS OF NEARLY ANYONE WITH WHOM WE WERE RELATED??? WHAT IF “WE” DID THE RIGHT THING (ASSUMING THAT WE WERE FINANCIALLY ABLE) TO AT LEAST SUPPLEMENT THE CARE AND OR TREATMENT OF OUR MENTALLY RETARDED OR ILL, AUTISTIC, ELDERLY AND INFIRM… WHAT IF WE ACCEPTED OUR ONCE CRITICAL (NOW OBSOLETE) ROLE AS A FAMILY UNIT? WHAT IF?

CAPITALISM

YES, IT’S VERY COMPLEX NOT TO MENTION – CONTROVERSIAL; NO SYSTEM WORKS PERFECTLY – YES THERE ARE ALL KINDS OF “ISM’S” OUT THERE. FOR EVEN IN THE BEST OF TIMES – EVEN HERE IN AMERICA – THERE ARE FAR TOO MANY PEOPLE WHO ARE UNEMPLOYED – TOO MANY JOBS LEADS TO INFLATION WHICH IN TURN LEADS TO UNEMPLOYMENT – WHICH LEADS TO A LOWER GDP – ON AND ON AND ON..

BUT IT IS THE BEST SYSTEM OUT THERE. WE ARE ASSURED FREE SPEECH – FREEDOM OF EXPRESSION – FREEDOM TO WORSHIP AS WE PLEASE. SYMBIOTIC CAPITALISM OVERSHADOWED BY LARGESS AND SELF RESPONSIBILITY CAN BE A WONDERFUL AND EQUITABLE INSTITUTION.

“THE CRIMINAL JUSTICE SYSTEM” – AN OXYMORON

LAWSUITS ARE REDISTRIBUTION OF WEALTH. LAWSUITS ARE OFTEN SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE – LEGALLY PERMISSIBLE THEFT. FRIVOLOUS LAWSUITS ARE COMMONPLACE – AND AWARDS ARE – TO PUT IT MILDLY – EXCESSIVE.

THE ATTORNEY’S ARE RUNNING THIS GREAT COUNTRY. CONGRESS IS PREDOMINANTLY COMPRISED OF LAWYER’S. THEY ARE THE ONE’S WHO HAVE PERMITTED LEGALIZED STEALING TO GO UNCHECKED. THEY REFER TO IT AS “BANKRUPTCY”. AS FOR THE “CRIMINAL INJUSTICE SYSTEM” – THEY TOO ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR CONTRIBUTING TO THE SEEMINGLY INEXTRICABLE MESS WE ARE IN.

SOMEBODY NEEDS TO SUE THOSE GUYS.

ARE THERE ANY TAKERS?

FORMAL EDUCATION

YOU KNOW IT’S VERY AMUSING TO ME – HOW SUBJECTS I ONCE VIEWED (WHILE IN SCHOOL) AS BORING AND IRRELEVANT – NOW AS AN ADULT – FASCINATE ME. SO THE PROCESS OF SELF-EDUCATION GIVES ME AN INDESCRIBABLE JOY. NOW FOLLOWING THE WRITING AND REDACTION OF DOZENS OF SCREENPLAYS, NOVELS, ESSAYS AND MANIFESTOES – I, AT AGE FIFTY-FOUR – READ NONFICTION AND AT A VORACIOUS PACE. AND ALL THE INTENDED GOAL OF REACHING AN EVENTUAL STATE OF ERUDITION CAN DO – IS TO IMPROVE MY ABILITY TO EXPRESS MYSELF. AND LEARNING WHAT I DEEM IMPORTANT WITHOUT CONCERN FOR A G.P.A – IS TRULY A WONDERFUL EXPERIENCE. SO PLAYING BY THE RULES IS NOT AN OBJECTIVE OF MINE. YET I AM HAPPY. I AM MORE PRODUCTIVE AND I GROW MORE AND MORE ENLIGHTENED BY THE DAY. YOU MAY VERY WELL HAVE THE DEGREE MY FRIENDS – BUT WITH A SLEW OF GOOD BOOKS, THE GIFT OF AFFLATUS AND SOME ASSISTANCE BY GOD – SOME OF YOU MAY VERY WELL LEARN A THING OR TWO FROM ME.

HOW TO RUN THE COUNTRY 101

YOU CAN INDEED OBTAIN A POLITICAL SCIENCE DEGREE AT NEARLY ANY UNIVERSITY SITUATED AROUND THE COUNTRY. BUT DO THEY HONESTLY PROVIDE YOU WITH A SUFFICIENT BACKGROUND TO AID IT’S RECIPIENT IN PURSUING A CAREER AS AN ENNOBLED MEMBER OF CONGRESS; AS VICE PRESIDENT AND TITULAR HEAD, OR ULTIMATELY, IN THE PIVOTAL POSITION AS PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES? IF NOT – WHY NOT?

DEMAGOGUERY 101

HOW TO BE A POPULIST

HOW POLITICAL POWER CORRUPTS AND WHY?

COMPASSION, EMPATHY – A “SINCERE CONCERN FOR THE PEOPLE” – AT LEAST BEING ABLE TO PUT ON SUCH A FACADE.

THESPIAN 101

LEGISLATIVE PROCEDURES – GRIDLOCK, PARTISANSHIP, THE RESTRICTIVE TWO PARTY SYSTEM AND HOW TO DRAFT PROSAIC LONG-WINDED INEFFECTIVE LEGISLATION USING LATIN AND LEGAL TERMINOLOGY (A LEXICON) THAT EVEN AN ENLIGHTENED VOTER DOESN’T UNDERSTAND

ON AND ON AND ON…

SARCASM AND CYNICISM ASIDE – SUCH AN EDUCATION SHOULD BEGIN AT LEAST IN JUNIOR HIGH SCHOOL. WHY? BECAUSE DESPITE THE REALITY THAT ATTAINING THE PRESIDENCY IS A THANKLESS POSITION – IT IS ONE OF THE MOST PRESTIGIOUS AND IMPORTANT JOBS ON THE PLANET. AND HOPEFULLY – IN THE PROCESS – SUCH AN EDUCATIONAL PROCESS WILL CREATE FUTURE ADVOCATES WHO WILL BECOME IMPASSIONED LEARNED PARTICIPANTS. MERGED WITH GUTS AND CREATIVITY – PERHAPS WE CAN CREATE LEADERS WHO CAN LITERALLY HELP TO TRANSFORM THIS WORLD. I CAN DREAM (AGAIN).

BLIND MUTATIONS

LET’S HAVE SOME FUN WHILE WE ANTAGONIZE THE ATHEIST (JUST KIDDING – EVEN THOUGH YOU GUYS AND GALS ARE GOING TO BURN IN HELL FOR ALL OF ETERNITY).

NOW WHAT? COMBINE THE CONSTITUENTS OF A HOUSE – ABS, PVC, NM 12-2 WITH GROUND, LUMBER, DRYWALL, NAILS, CDX, T-111 AND LOTS OF OTHER SHIT AND WAIT AND WAIT AND WAIT AND WATCH IT EVOLVE INTO A HOUSE. ALL THAT WILL HAPPEN IS ATROPHY, DECOMPOSITION AND OR DECAY – RIGHT? WRONG!!! NEXT – PLACE THE CONSTITUENTS OF “MAN” IN AN EXTREMELY SALTY SOLUTION – ADD LOT’S OF SUNLIGHT IN THE TOTAL ABSENCE OF AN OZONE LAYER TO FILTER-OUT DEADLY LIFE KILLING RAYS – THROW-IN A TOXIC ATMOSPHERE – SOME MAGIC DUST AND WATCH AND WAIT AGAIN FOR EON’S AS IT FIRST EVOLVES INTO A CONDUCIVE ENVIRONMENT THAT CANNOT TAKE PLACE IN THE ABSENCE OF PRIMITIVE LIFE. (A CATCH 22) . GIVE IT SEVERAL BILLION MORE YEARS – MORE MAGIC DUST, FOLLOWED BY TRILLIONS OF MUTATIONS IN THE COMPLETE ABSENCE OF GUIDANCE AND WHAT DO YOU END-UP WITH – A VERY VERY COMPLEX HUMAN ORGANISM THAT HAS A PHYSIOGNOMY THAT IS AESTHETICALLY PLEASING AND UNIFORM (PERHAPS A HOLLY BERRIE OR A JENNIFER LOPEZ) . A CONTEMPORARY BEING WHO EXTRACTS, INVENTS AND MOLDS THE MATERIAL – WHO CREATES A VIABLE ECONOMIC MARKET – WHO DESIGNS A POLITICAL AND SOCIAL STRUCTURE – WHO BECOMES A DEMOCRAT, A REPUBLICAN, AN INDEPENDENT, A COMMUNIST, A SOCIALIST, AN ARTIST, WRITER, MUSICIAN, AND AN ARCHITECT – WHO LIKES THE SMELL OF HIS FARTS – WHO

DESIGNS A BUILDS A HOUSE – AND IN APPROXIMATELY ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY YEARS OF GROWTH – CREATES A GLOBAL CIVILIZATION – THAT INVENTS CALCULUS, PHYSICS, BIOLOGICAL ENGINEERING, THAT MAPS THE GENOME – ON AND ON AND ON…

AND ALL IT’S COMPRISED

OF IS STAR DUST.

(AHA.)

AT ONE PIVOTAL POINT IN MY LIFE, I EXAMINED THE WORLD AND THE RISE AND FALL OF WORLD WAR TWO NAZI GERMAN; THE STULTIFICATION, THE DEHUMANIZATION OF THE JEW, THE GYPSY, THE HOMOSEXUAL, THE PHYSICALLY AND INTELLECTUALLY DISABLED. I SAW EVIL THAT WAS SO EXTREME – SO PRETERNATURAL IN NATURE – THAT I CAREFULLY, THOUGHTFULLY CONCLUDED THAT SATAN WAS INDEED ALIVE AND LIVING VICARIOUSLY AMONG US. CERTAINLY MANKIND COULD NOT OF HIS OWN VOLITION BE SO MALEVOLENT, HEARTLESS – SO CRUEL AND INHUMANE – IN THE COMPLETE ABSENCE OF A NEFARIOUS EXTERNAL FORCE? HOWEVER, ONE OF THE INEVITABLE PROBLEMS IS – THAT ONCE YOU PRESUME THAT SATAN IS NOT SIMPLY A CHIMERA – THE EXISTENCE OF A BENEVOLENT GOD CLOSELY FOLLOWS. AND ALL OF A SUDDEN I HAD VISIONS OF LINDA BLAIR SPEWING LUMPY GREEN VOMIT AS HER GLOWING RED EYES BUGGED-OUT AND HER DISJOINTED HEAD ROTATED UNCONTROLLABLY.

IS IT THE INTRINSIC NATURE OF “MAN” THAT PERMITS AN ECCLESIASTIC TO BETRAY THE TRUST OF GOD AND OF COURSE OF A CHILD – OR IS IT THE DEVIOUS MACHINATION OF A MALEVOLENT FORCE? WHEN A PHYSICIAN WHO ALLEGEDLY LIVES BY THE CREDO OF THE HYPOCRITICAL OATH – CASUALLY DISMEMBERING A FETUS – AGAIN TREATING A HELPLESS HUMAN LIFE AS IF IT WERE A TISSUE EXTRACTION – IS IT GOD OR SATAN AT WORK?

SO NOW WHAT? I SUPPOSE THAT THOSE OF YOU WHO BELIEVE THAT EVEN THE MOST HIDEOUS ACTS IN HISTORY ARE DUE TO THE NATURE OF MAN AND THAT OF ONLY OF MAN – YOU BELIEVE THAT SOMEHOW

ALONG THE WAY THAT I HAVE BLOWN AN INTELLECTUAL OR NOETIC HEAD GASKET! IF YOU ARE RIGHT – THEN IT IS MY DISCONCERTING VERY DISTURBING VIEW THAT THE SURVIVAL OF MANKIND IS SINCERELY IN JEOPARDY. AND THE MAXIM THAT “THE DEVIL MADE ME DO IT!” – IS NOT MERELY A FIGMENT OF THE IMAGINATION – PERHAPS IT IS AN EPITAPH THAT WILL BE REDACTED ON MANKIND’S TOMBSTONE.

SEXUALITY

IT’S JUST NOT THE LIFE I WANT TO LEAD – AS AN ICONOCLASTIC SINGLE MALE WHO DOES NOT EVEN HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO ATTRACT A DESPERATE WOMAN – I MUST – SHOULD I PLAY BY THE RULES – REMAIN ALONE AND CELIBATE FOR THE REMAINDER OF MY LIFE. AS I UNDERSTAND IT – I CANNOT EVEN LUST AFTER A WOMAN AND THAT OF COURSE MUST COINCIDE WITH SEXUAL RESTRAINT AND THE PRETERNATURAL ALLURE OF A BEAUTIFUL NUBILE WOMAN. THIS IS SIMPLY UNREASONABLE, UNREALISTIC AND DOWNRIGHT MEAN. AS AN AGING PARANOID SCHIZOPHRENIC, I HAVE VERY LITTLE IN LIFE TO LOOK FORWARD TO. FOOD IS THE ENEMY. SEX IS THE ENEMY. I SUPPOSE PLEASURE IN GENERAL IS MY DOWNFALL. I CANNOT EVEN DRINK ALCOHOL EVEN IN MODERATION – SO I SUPPOSE THAT YOU COULD SAY THAT LIFE IS THE ENEMY AS WELL. SO – ALL I CAN AFFORD – ALL I CAN RISK (DUE TO IT’S LOW COST, AVAILABILITY AND OR ABUNDANCE AND YES – IT’S COMPLETE LACK OF DETRIMENT TOWARDS MY HEALTH) IS PORNOGRAPHY. WHOM DOES MASTURBATION HURT? ALL IT IS – IS THE SIMPLE STIMULATION OF GENITALIA – AN ORGAN WHOSE USE CONJURES IMAGES OF ETERNAL DAMNATION – OF PERDITION. IT IS GOOD FOR THE CIRCULATORY SYSTEM. IT PROVIDES A RELEASE FOR SEXUAL PENT-UP TENSION OR ANXIETY. IF PEOPLE WERE NOT MADE TO FEEL GUILTY ABOUT IT – SEX THAT DOES NOT SPREAD OR TRANSMIT DISEASE – SEX THAT DOES NOT MAKE UNWANTED BABIES THAT ARE ALL TOO OFTEN MERCILESSLY KILLED BY DISMEMBERMENT – IS PHYSIOLOGICALLY AND EMOTIONALLY SALUTARY. YES, SEX GIRDED BY LOVE IS A GODSEND. YET IN THE ABSENCE OF A CONJUGAL BOND IT IS FORNICATION, SIN, GUILT-PRODUCING BEHAVIOR THAT CAN SADLY AND CURIOUSLY (AND ALLEGEDLY) – GUARANTEE YOU A A PLACE IN HELL AND FOR ALL OF ETERNITY. SO WITH THIS DRACONIAN THREAT LOOMING – I MUST KEEP MY ZIPPER ZIPPED AND MY LIBIDO IN CHECK. I MUST IN ESSENCE – BE MISERABLE, BORED, SEXUALLY FRUSTRATED (AGAIN) FOR THE REMAINDER OF MY BELEAGUERED LIFE.

SO NOW WHAT? I HAVE A SIGNIFICANT DECISION TO MAKE; DO I RISK THE MISERABLE FATE OF PERDITION (FOR THE “HEINOUS” ACT OF MASTURBATION) OR – DO I ENJOY A WONDERFUL ASPECT OF LIFE IRONICALLY GIVEN TO US BY GOD (YES FOR REPRODUCTION) – BUT ALSO – DICHOTOMOUSLY, FOR OUR DIRE PLEASURE? DO I AT LEAST ATTEMPT TO LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST – TO THE BEST OF MY ABILITY – YES, AS A MORAL, ETHICAL AND ALTRUISTIC PERSON WHO IS CHARACTERIZED BY LARGESS AND DRIVEN BY PHILANTHROPIC MOTIVES – WHO IS UNFORTUNATELY, HYPOCRITICALLY A HELL-BOUND MASTURBATOR? OR DO I LIVE THE LIFE OF A TRUE BELIEVER WHO SUPPLANTS FOOD WITH SEX – SEXUAL GRATIFICATION WITH OBESITY? I WILL STIMULATE MY TASTE BUDS BY EATING PUMPKIN PIE AND CHEESECAKE. I WILL EXCITE MY SENSE OF SMELL BY SMELLING FRESH GROUND COFFEE BAKED BREAD. I WILL AROUSE MY SENSE OF TOUCH WITH A FULL BODY MASSAGE; MY SENSE OF HEARING BY LISTENING TO MOZART OR CAT STEVEN’S. I WILL DRINK-IN WORKS OF ART COMPOSED BY THE SAVANT USING ALL FIVE OF MY SENSES. AND I WILL – AT THE RIDICULOUS RISK OF ALLEGEDLY ALIENATING GOD – USE MY GENITALIA FOR BOTH URINATION AND PLEASURE. AND I WILL APOLOGIZE TO NO ONE. I WILL NOT LIVE MY LIFE AS A SYBARITE – BUT NOR WILL I LIVE MY LIFE AS AN ASCETIC – ENDURING BOTH ABSTINENCE AND SELF-DENIAL. I WILL INDULGE IN ART, LITERATURE, MUSIC AND FOOD AND YES – I WILL STIMULATE MY GENITALIA . IN OTHER WORDS IN MODERATION – I WILL LIVE MY LIFE TO THE FULLEST. (HURTING NO ONE IN THE PROCESS.) ALL ASSUMING THAT I CONTROL THE SEX AND THAT THE SEX DOES NOT CONTROL ME. I WILL NOT BE FORCED INTO ACQUIESCENCE BY AN UNREASONABLE SO CALLED DOCTRINAL OR IDEOLOGICAL ULTIMATUM.

I WILL – IN ESSENCE – LIVE FREE OR DIE.

TERRORISM

I HAVE A SUGGESTION – PERHAPS WE COULD RECRUIT AN ASSEMBLAGE OF VOLUNTARY MUSLIM RELIGIOUS LEADERS (CLERICS) WHO DESPITE THEIR ADHERENCE TO ISLAMIC DOCTRINE – ARE AT PEACE WITH THE WORLD -YES ALL DESPITE IT’S RELIGIOUS DIVERSITY? AN ECCLESIASTICAL UNION WHO HAVE SEVERAL PRIMARY OBJECTIVES :

TO ATTEMPT TO MEET AND REASON WITH THEIR (OUR) MUSLIM BROTHERS.

TO SEEK TO UNDERSTAND THEIR MINDSET AND OR MENTALITY.

TO USE THEIR STATE OF ERUDITION REGARDING ISLAMIC CANON OR CREED – TO GENTLY COUCH OR PROMULGATE THE USE OF NONVIOLENCE TO IMPLEMENT CHANGE.

TO HUMANIZE ONE ANOTHER.

TO ATTEMPT TO BREACH ISLAMIC IDEOLOGICAL ARMOR – TO LOCATE COMMON GROUND – TO ATTEMPT TO REACH SOME SORT OF A COMPROMISE.

SOLUTIONS BEGIN WITH DIALOGUE. ALL I ASK IS THAT WE TRY.

DON’T TAKE IT FOR GRANTED

FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO ARE BLESSED WITH A LOVING DEVOTED SPOUSE – PLEASE BEAR IN MIND THAT THERE ARE COUNTLESS MILLIONS – PERHAPS TEN’S OF MILLIONS OF PEOPLE AROUND THE WORLD WHO HAVE NEVER EXPERIENCED THE BEAUTY AND COMPASSION; YES THE FRIENDSHIP OF A DEDICATED LOYAL PARTNER. SOME OF US HAVE NEVER KNOWN WHAT IT IS TO BE IN LOVE. MANY OF US HAVE SIMPLY GIVEN UP ON LOCATING SOMEONE WITH WHOM WE COULD SIMPLY RELATE. YES –

PART OF IT IS MY OWN RESPONSIBILITY; THOSE WOMEN I’M ATTRACTED TO – ARE SIMPLY OUT OF REACH. THEY ARE TO BE HONEST – WAY OUT OF MY LEAGUE. YES, I HAVE AN ALL-CONSUMING PASSION FOR JOURNALISTS/NEWS ANCHORS WHO WIELD THE CONTROLS ON CNN, FOX AND MSNBC. BEAUTY, INTELLECT, EDUCATION AND YES, PERSONALITY – APPEARS TO BE A REQUIREMENT FOR SUCH A COURAGEOUS AND NOBLE PROFESSION. THEN ALL I NEED TO IMPLEMENT AS A RENAISSANCE MAN IS TO SLIM-DOWN AND BULK-UP; TO SELL A SCREENPLAY OR TWO; TO GROW HAIR, BUILD COURAGE, AND TO SOMEHOW TRANSFORM MYSELF INTO A WITTY, FUNNY GUY WHO SOMEHOW HAS THE CAPACITY TO KEEP “HER” INTERESTED AND ENTERTAINED FOR A LIFETIME. YES – OBVIOUSLY EASIER SAID THAN DONE.

I’VE SAID IT BEFORE AND I’LL SAY IT AGAIN:

EVERY ANNIVERSARY IS A MILESTONE;

EVERY MEAL A BANQUET;

EVERY CONVERSATION – AN EPIPHANY.

“THERE’ S JUST TOO MUCH IN LIFE TO LIVE FOR”

LIFE CAN BE HARSH – EVEN BRUTAL AT TIMES. AND FOR THOSE OF US BURDENED WITH THE PREDISPOSITION TOWARDS DEPRESSION – ONLY EXACERBATES THE TRAVAILS OF DAY TO DAY LIVING. FAITH IN A COMPASSIONATE FORGIVING, GOD – HELPS – YES, DESPITE OUR DISMAY AS TO HIS (SOMETIMES) SEEMINGLY INDIFFERENT REGARD FOR OUR PAIN; PARTICULARLY FOR THE UNFAIR EXPERIENCES OF THOSE AMONG US WHO

ARE THE MOST VULNERABLE AND INNOCENT. CHEMOTHERAPY THAT (HOPEFULLY) COUNTERS THE DEBILITATING EFFECTS OF A BIOCHEMICAL BRAIN IMBALANCE – IS BUT A SINGLE MILESTONE IN A SOMETIMES LONG, ARDUOUS JOURNEY OF SELF-DISCOVERY. SO? WHY CONTINUE – WHEN THOUGHTS OF ENDING LIFE AS WE KNOW IT – OVERWHELMS EVEN THE BEAUTY, THE INTRICACY AND MYSTERY OF IT ALL? BECAUSE EVEN THIS FLEETING, EXACTING MOMENT HERE ON EARTH – IS WELL WORTH ENDURING THE COALESCENCE OF – THE TOTALITY OF – OUR INEXPLICABLE FORTUITOUS JOURNEY. SO – WHEN I’M FEELING DOWN – I DELVE INTO THE MIND BOGGLING ESOTERIC NATURE OF BOTH FLORA AND FAUNA; INTO THE ALCHEMIC DICHOTOMOUS (BOTH FINITE AND INFINITE) COMPOSITION AND INCIPIENCE OF THIS MIRACULOUS UNIVERSE; I INDULGE IN THE EXTRAORDINARY BEAUTY AND COMPLEXITY OF PRISTINE WILDERNESS. I STRIVE TO SETUP A CAMPSITE AMIDST A COPSE OF OLD-GROWTH FOREST. I FISH IN THE CLEAR WATER’S OF A BABBLING BROOK OR GENTLY FLOWING STREAM. YES, I ISOLATE, I SEQUESTER, I CLOISTER MYSELF AND I RUMINATE. I SAVOR NATURE AND GOD AND I ENTER INTO A SUBLIMINAL PRETERNATURAL STATE THAT ENIGMATICALLY PERMITS ME A BRIEF NEXUS WITH GOD. (THIS FROM A FORMER ATHEIST) I PERUSE OR VET THE PAGES OF A BOOK ON BIOLOGY – THAT ONLY OBVIATES THE THEORY OF BLIND EVOLUTION THROUGH MUTATIONS. – AND ALLEGEDLY (CURIOUSLY) IN THE COMPLETE ABSENCE OF INTELLIGENT DESIGN. AND I EXPLORE THE SEEMINGLY BOUNDLESS GENIUS OF MAN; HIS ARCHITECTURE, ART, SCIENCE, LITERATURE, ENGINEERING AND TECHNOLOGY. I SCRUTINIZE THE AMAZING UNIFORMITY AND ELEGANCE OF THE HUMAN FORM. AND I

ENGAGE IN THE MOST EXHILARATING EXPERIENCE OF ALL – I INDULGE MY SPIRIT OF LARGESS AND I DONATE MY LIMITED RESOURCES TO THE NEEDY. I BECOME AN ADVOCATE FOR THE CHILDREN AT SAINT JUDE’S RESEARCH HOSPITAL; A CHARITABLE ORGANIZATION THAT TENDS TO THE NEEDS OF THE INFIRM WHO ARE COMBATTING CHILDHOOD CANCER; AN ORGANIZATION I WILL ONE DAY VISIT; A HOSPITAL WHERE I WILL ONE DAY EMOTE; A PLACE THAT WILL EVOKE EMPATHY; THAT WILL GIVE ME HOPE; THAT WILL INSPIRE PURPOSE – BY THOSE WHO ARE COURAGEOUSLY HOLDING ONTO LIFE WITH THE MATURITY OF AN ADULT AND THE UNCOMMON WISDOM OF A SAGE.

AND WHEN IT IS ALL SAID AND DONE:

I WILL PRAY TO GOD.

I WILL CRY.

I WILL LAUGH.

I WILL APPRECIATE.

AND IN THE COMPLETE ABSENCE OF UNCERTAINTY –

I WILL LIVE YET ANOTHER DAY.